Hi Reader,
It's 7 p.m. and my living room has been three different rooms today.
A playroom.
A family room.
A living room.
All the same room, because that's what I've got, and maybe you do too. So by evening the floor is a layer of toys, a couple of throw blankets that migrated off the couch, cups, and a random pair of shoes.
Here's the part I had to get honest with my organized self. I had to accept that I'm in a once-in-my-lifetime toddler stage, where no matter what I do, it's going to be undone. Lol. ...and that I will be too tired at the end of the day to restore it to its former glory. That's not an organizing problem. That's a "I'm in a unique season of life, one-set-of-hands" problem.
That's where family, friends or a housekeeper come into play. For us, we have a generous mother-in-law ;) who comes over to play with Dylan while I focus on work projects (like a huge one I'm about to announce later this year!) or do an in-person organizing job. She also, thank God, picks up this room for us every week (and does the dishes). It's the biggest blessing and it's taught me that it is ok to ask for help. That it's ok to have extra help.
Most moms would happily take a little more help around the house. Getting everyone to actually participate is a whole different story. Kids have their own idea of what "clean" means. The people we love have their own habits. And somehow Mom stays the one who holds the whole picture in her head.
Getting your family involved doesn't have to turn your home into a chore chart boot camp. Here's what actually moves the needle.
GIVE EVERYTHING IN THAT ROOM A HOME.
This is the whole game. Your family can't put things away if there's nowhere for things to go. One basket for the toys that live in there. (I need to do this one myself!) A spot for the blankets. A tray for the remotes, for those who have older kiddos that won't punch every button. Every item must have a home.
Because when it doesn't? It becomes a pile. And a pile is often something only you can decode.
TEACH IT, DON'T JUST ASSIGN IT.
Walk the room once with your spouse, kiddos, family member, housekeeper, or whoever is helping you. Show them where the basket is, drop a toy in, let them drop the next one. For little ones, keep it stupidly simple: open bins they can reach, a few big categories, nothing with a lid they'll fight. For older kids, give them a real zone of their own and some say in how it works. They just might possibly keep up a system they helped build.
RUN ONE RESET, NOT A DEEP CLEAN.
At the end of the day, five minutes, everybody grabs what's theirs and walks it home. Set a timer. You can do almost anything for five minutes, and so can a four-year-old, well maybe 2 minutes. They are going to mess it up. They'll throw the blanket on the floor. They'll shove the cup behind the couch. They'll forget the system you showed them yesterday. Consistency matters more than perfection.
We're not raising a tidy living room, we're teaching little humans a skill they'll use for the rest of their lives, and learning takes repetition and a whole lot of grace. For them, and for you.
You don't have to be the only one who feels the struggle and the weight of a messy home and family. You don't have to feel like everybody else has it figured out and you're the only one still putting away dinner leftovers at 10 p.m.
So, I'm doing something I've been building toward for a while. I'm opening up a private Facebook group. It's for women talking about real homes, real family life, routines, and finding a little more peace in the middle of all of it. No Pinterest pressure, just Pinterest inspo.
It's not a random virtual assistant from another country running it. It's just me. Solo. ...with special appearances by Dylan. I'll be in the group almost daily reading and replying personally. Because sometimes you don't need another person telling you how to run your home like they run their home. You just need a room full of supportive women who are figuring out how to organize THEIR home, THEIR way, with you.
Welcome to G.R.A.C.E. Come on in.
๐ Join the group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/busymomsdeclutterandorganizeyourhomewithgrace โ
I've been stalling for months to open up the group, because, well it's 100% NOT perfect. I don't have a daily or even weekly rhythm in place yet (my AI Agent, who I need to name, is helping me figure this out) for how I'll get fresh, relevant and helpful organizing content to you, but I will figure it out. So, please be patient with me and just know you're in something brand new and a part of something from the ground up. You get to watch me build it in real-time, imperfections and all!!! In theatre, before we had the official dress rehearsals we would have stumble-throughs and they were so helpful in getting ready for the dress rehearsal because there was WAYYYYYY less pressure and you didn't have to do the performance perfectly. So, let's stumble through this together, shall we?
What's the one room in your house doing three jobs at once? Hit reply and let me know. Though I may not have time to reply, I read every response.
Be Extraordinary,
A few questions you might have...
How do I get my family to help keep the house picked up? Start by giving everything a home, because nobody can put away what has nowhere to go. Then teach the system once by walking the room together instead of assigning chores from across the house. Keep the expectation simple and the same every day. Help that's easy to give is help people actually give.
How do I teach my kids to pick up their own space? Match it to their age. Little ones need open bins they can reach and only a few categories. Elementary kids can learn where specific things live and own a small zone. Tweens and teens keep up a system they helped design. Show them, practice together, and expect to repeat it many times. That repetition is the lesson.
What is the G.R.A.C.E. Method? It's my five-step way to organize a home that actually holds: Gather, Release, Acquire, Cultivate, Enjoy. The step most families skip is Cultivate, giving every item a home so the room can reset in minutes instead of unraveling by bedtime. It's less about a perfect house and more about a resilient one.
My family keeps messing up the system. Am I doing it wrong? No. They're going to throw things on the floor and forget what you showed them yesterday, and that's part of learning, not proof it failed. Consistency matters more than perfection. Keep guiding, keep adjusting as they grow, and give those little humans, and yourself, a whole lot of grace.
Can you help me set up systems my whole family can actually keep up? Yes, that's most of what I do. I build organizing systems around how your family really lives, not around a one-size-fits-all template, so they're intuitive from day one and still easy to maintain months later. You can book a 1:1 with me, in person or virtual, and we'll start with the room that's wearing you out most.
ADD A LITTLE BEAUTY TO YOUR LIFE
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3. โโListen to a Podcast!
This week: "How to Declutter Your Home When You Feel Overwhelmed" on the Faith Mom Mentor Podcast with Anne Gurley. We talked about getting the kids involved without a chore battle, exactly what this week's email is about. Listen.
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